Icewind's Ramblings

I’ve had this one tucked away for many months now debating when to post it as I have moved away from some of my earlier funny but questionable musings.  But I do feel it is a subject that many experience but may never have thought to ask . . . Well that’s why I am here to help . . . your itchy butt expert who took two years of research without any government grants to give you this insightful information. Have you ever needed to scratch your butt in public but there were too many witnesses?  Well I have a solution for you for just about any situation. Icewind’s Guide on “How to Scratch your Butt in Public (without unwanted stares)”. 1. The Wall Approach - Slowly back-up towards the closest wall possible. Then, take desired hand & move it towards the itchy buttocks.  Scratch uncontrollably, until its better. 2. The Pants Approach - “The Back Pocket” carefully reach into the back pocket of your pants.  Slowly itch the desired cheek and act like yo...

A lot of you know by now that I try to keep my eyes peering for anything that may strike my fancy for a blog. I think people who observe things or people around them find inspiration almost anywhere. I had to make a late-night run to the 24 hour Fred Meyer store down the street from my house the other night - and it was not the fun kind. You know what I mean, when you were younger and stayed out late at night making that pit stop between parties when you grab Doritos, eye drops, Red Bull and aspirin and you're off to the next hot spot especially here in Alaska where there is the always constant daylight in the summertime. This sortie from home was after eating more fajitas than I should have which was not to say there wasn't a sense of urgency involved in this trip. So I hurry into the store, run to the aisle marked "stomach" (although let's face it, it wasn't really my stomach I was worried about) and stop in sheer awe of the selections avai...