Missing and presumed . . .

“Bull” the Moose was last seen wandering around my subdivision in South Anchorage just a few days ago. It is assumed that “Bully” was lured into an area just down the road where several female moose were seen casually going about their business of attracting prospective fathers for next years batch of bull.

“Bull” the moose was 3 years 6 months and 17 days old when last seen. He was sporting legal antlers and a huge gaggle, a magnificent coat, and he reeked of urine. “Bull” never came to his name when called, only looked up at you momentarily and continued eating.














If you believe “Bull” is near you should . . .

1. Place the first finger of your left hand over your right nostril and press down firmly.

2. Take a deep breath through your mouth.

3. Exhale rapidly through your entire sinus cavity while rubbing finger briskly over your nose while making a HEEEEEEEEEE! sound. This, if he's alive, should bring “Bully” running.

It is advisable that you be near a secure area where you can take shelter, because “Bull” is or was quite prone lately to violent hormonal outbursts. “Bull” gave us joy and we wish him the best.

If “Bully” is gone forever we shall be comforted knowing a small wee-“Bull” will show up with its mom next spring in our neighborhood.

Ice

Comments

Popular posts from this blog

Morrison Springs - Ponce de Leon, Florida

Are Showing Your Nipples Appropriate Work Attire?

Biscuits and Whores