Icewind's Ramblings

This story was sent to me by a friend so I have to share it with everyone. If you have raised kids (or been one), and gone through the pet syndrome including toilet flush burials for dead goldfish, the story below will have you laughing out loud! Overview: I (Mom) had to take my son's lizard to the vet. Here's what happened: Just after dinner one night, my son came up to tell me there was "something wrong" with one of the two lizards he holds prisoner in his room. "He's just laying here looking sick," he told me. "I'm serious, Mom. Can you help?" I put my best lizard-healer expression on my face and followed him into his bedroom. One of the little lizards was indeed lying on his back, looking stressed. I immediately knew what to do. "Honey," I called, "come look at the lizard!" My husband diagnosed after a minute, “Oh gosh, she's having babies." "What?" my son deman...

As many of you know I try to write to my blog, Icewind’s Ramblings most everyday unless I am out of town or have real life things to keep me from looking at life in that demented way that I do. Can you see where this is going? I was checking my 'bulk' folder this evening on one of my email accounts -- making sure none of your treasured comments happened to get routed to the slush pile -- when a message header caught my eye: “You dream of rivers of sperm, of a penis enormous and firm.” Now, first of all, let me assure you that I don't. I cannot recall ever entertaining that idea or mental picture. Dream of 'rivers of sperm', that is. Not to the best of my knowledge, anyway. I might dream of falling, or running away from monsters (usually my inner demons), or -- once, rather unfortunately -- eating a giant marshmallow during a camping trip. But swiftly-flowing streams of semen? No. It's possible now I'll have that nightmare about it. N...

Today kinda feels like a 'quick hit' sort of day. So I'll start this post now, and update it later with more saucy snippets. Or I won't; only time will tell. But here comes the first bit now: Living World Trivia Hummingbirds can't walk. Ice

I had written this back during the Christmas holidays and never posted this at the time. I have since changed jobs but at the time I had moved my office from a nice quiet end of the hallway location into another part of the building back into the mainstream of activity and distractions from getting work done. Maybe you can relate to this. . . I was going through my mail when my manager poked his head in my office. Quick! My mind has a flashback to a Dilbert cartoon. Dilbert gets back from a business trip and settles in his cubicle and says, 'Ah, being back in my cubicle is like being back in the security of the womb'. Just then, the boss pokes his head in and says, 'Just thought I'd poke my head in and see how you're doing.' Return to the present. My boss pokes his head in and says, “You've moved” . Don't say it. Don't say it. Running through my mind, 'I can see you got to be a manager because of your superior observational sk...

I was actually kind of crazy at work yesterday. I sang and hummed to myself and whatever customers were around at the time. I think I may have freaked a few of them out with my ‘happiness’ at 2 in the afternoon. I wished someone was up for heading down to the Kenai River fishing last night but it was raining hard with no end in sight for this weekend. Red Salmon There is an amazing phenomenon that occurs for a short time each summer in the Last Frontier as thousands of Alaskan residents, both young and old from all walks of life, take a break from whatever they are busy doing at the time to storm the shores of several Alaska Rivers. Other Alaskans know exactly what they're up to as soon as they lay eyes on the twenty foot long-pole contraptions of every sort, shape and size with very large nets attached that are carried on every conceivable car, truck (“rig” in Alaskan slang), or camper. This ritual for some can be alone while others come with friends to share in this u...