Self-Discovery or Self-Reflection or is it a little of both?

In the Zac Brown song, “Quiet your mind” it starts out:

“I hear the waves
Sun beatin' down on my shoulders
It's a near-perfect day
Wishin' I wouldn't get any older
They say that it's gone 'fore you know it

Quiet your mind
Soak it all in
It's a game you can't win
Enjoy the ride”

There’s something to be said for slowing things down a bit, ridding yourself of the clutter and noise of everything going on around you.  Sometimes it’s hard to make progress on our journey of self-discovery in all the chaos around us.  There are times that through the chaos it forces us to reach out to those places where we may not want to venture.  I believe that when people are going through difficult situations in life it causes them to search a lot more.   They search life and search their soul.  When you’re searching, you’re suddenly a lot more open to the world around you, to the possibilities, to things you never thought about before.   

When you’re happy, you don’t question the world so much.   When you’re lost, you question everything.   The very reason why is because it is so essential to human self-discovery.   If you're happy, if you're feeling good, then nothing else matters. 

I have always liked the movie Forrest Gump and the way in the movie that Forrest’s life is happenstance and wanders . . . only to find him in a place in time that has an effect on everyone around him.  Hopefully my life has had some effect on those I have been in contact with during my lifetime.

Is it dumb luck or destiny?  Some of both I suppose but it amazes me that our own lives sometimes make twists and turns that surprise us.  Did we have our own plan and it worked out or did things happen as dumb luck blowing in the wind much life the feather in the movie?  

Did preparation meet opportunity happen in the cosmos giving us unexpected results?

Could it be that simple?  I think not.  Everyone has a destiny, but the journey to find it is undefined.   Forrest is like the feather, blown around by the wind and does whatever he is told.  This journey, though random and simple, leads Forrest to many good things. He never knew where he would end up, but he reached it all the same.

Is that how life really is? 

Is the Zig Ziglar saying, “Success is not the destination, it’s the journey.” the way to tell us to seek out and enjoy what life brings ones way?

Self-reflection is a powerful tool for cultivating a fulfilling and meaningful life.  When you dig deeper, you can discover what it is you know, what you think & how you want to be in the world.  When you know yourself, really know yourself, you can live according to your values and passions, make a positive contribution to the world and simply have more fun.

In other words, once you know your priorities and perspectives, you can make deliberate decisions based on those things, intentionally creating a more connected life that is true to you.  Not reacting to life but being proactive in the positive direction one would like to take.

One of my favorite books over the years has been “Illusions – The Adventures of a Reluctant Messiah” by Richard Bach.  I have read and re-read it for 40 years now and it remains a sort of ‘Life Bible’ for me through the years.

It is a simple book and quick easy read but has many gems on how you should live life and treat other people.  Bach is an aviator and flying stories over the years has been his common theme in many of his books.  One of his early books was ‘Jonathon Livingston Seagull’ which was made into a movie.

I have after a period of time gone back and read things again and asked myself some of the questions and have been surprised by the changing answers over the years.  Was it maturity or circumstance that brought about the perspective swings? 

“There is no such thing as a problem without a gift for you in its hands. You seek problems because you need their gifts.”

We all learn from our past, sometimes we repeat the past until we have more clarity on that which we seek.  We learn from the problems so at times I see where people create things so they can gain from the experience.

“Every person, all the events of your life, are there because you have drawn them there. What you choose to do with them is up to you.”

This one seems so true for me as those that come in and out of our lives over the years allows one to see what place they may take in the ‘theater’ we call life.  Who is on your front row and who places themselves in the back?  Who moves around in your life theater being at the front row for you and possibly moves to the back no longer there for you?  Did their own circumstances make those changes or did something get lost in the relationship to make those swings?

“Remember where you came from, where you're going, and why you created the mess you got yourself into in the first place.”

We learn from our past or would like to think so.  What have you created to learn from?

Read the book “Illusions” by Richard Bach and see if you find meaning in his words, I know I have over the years.

To contemplate the power of questions — questions like “What do we need to learn to grow and experience life to our fullest?”  The questions we ask shape the lives we lead.

“Who am I?”

The exploration of this question helps reveal your essence as an energetic being; it also highlights our possibilities and reminds us that we’re more than our bodies.

“What do I need right now more than anything else?”

Too often I find we neglect what we most need to be happy and healthy.  For instance, you might need to sleep, a massage, exercise or rest.  Whatever it is you have to respond to your need.  Doing so will help us not only address our short-term needs but also, by extension, our long-term happiness.

“What meaning can I draw from this experience?”

Every experience has a purpose and potential lesson.  Of course, the lesson may be tough to swallow, but doing so prompts awareness, curiosity, compassion and resilience. In other words, focusing on the lesson will help us keep going in tough times.

“What feeling do I most want to have in my life?  What do I want to be doing more of in my life?  What do I want to be doing less of in my life?”

These three questions, they help us explore what we really want and whether what we’re currently doing actually reflects that.  For instance, we might want a feeling of peace and relief but keep signing up for high-pressure responsibilities.  When we’re creating a fulfilling life, it’s important to cut out the things that weigh us down and add the things that lift us up.

“What am I resisting, or attaching to?”

For many of us the fear of not being enough or not having something turn out the way we want shows up as resistance or attachment and prevent growth.  However, when you identify what you’re resisting or attaching to, you can refocus on cultivating acceptance and expansion. When we are not resisting or attaching, we are free to experience life fully.

“What are my gifts?  How can I share them with the world?”

For instance, your gifts might include a great sense of humor, playing the piano, acting with kindness, creating art and volunteering your time.  By being yourself you share one of your greatest gifts to everyone.  Expecting nothing in return is by far the best reward to yourself as you have freely given of yourself, no strings attached.

“How can I celebrate each day, or the moments of my life?”

We tend to forget that every moment is ripe with gratitude and gifts.  This question prompts you to take notice of the good stuff coming in; to pause to give thanks and mark the moments that uplift us all.  By realizing that the clock of our lives is a “NOW” clock with the only real time being this moment we are experiencing NOW.  

The past cannot be changed; the future is only a possibility until it reaches NOW.  

Neither exist in the NOW time.

Again, the questions we ask influence the quality of our lives.

Ask good questions and good things come into your life.  Questions fire up our curiosity and they also illuminate the depth of our soul and psyche.  This kind of reflection leads to growth, compassion, contribution and appreciation.

I think this is longer than I anticipated but do not want to lose this thought process by breaking it up into several posts.  This is probably longer than the typical bathroom break read.

“You are never given a wish without being given the power to make it true.  You may have to work for it, however.”

The old adage “There is no free lunch” is so true about so many things in life.  It takes work, and many times it is hard work to make your wishes and dreams (goals) come true.

If you, like me are on this journey towards self-discovery, you are inevitably also on a journey towards a fearless expression, what I also call your natural expression unfolding.

Though a good part of self-discovery is about understanding your nature as the “spirit” (life-energy or stream of consciousness), that you are in your essence, this understanding is then used to burn through all the “hang ups” you have in your human nature, which you’ve created through holding on to fear-based/limiting thoughts, and thus realize your authentic expression.

Each of us is unique in our human nature, and so this discovery is very personal.

Only you can explore this discovery in yourself, you can’t trust anyone else (not even your intimate spouse or your therapist of 10 years) with it because only you can meet yourself 100%, no-one else can do that for you.

The deal is that in order to discover yourself you have to be willing to be fearless of what you discover, and how your life will change with these discoveries.  Of course, the more you discover yourself the more aligned you feel, and the more abundant your experience of life becomes.

It’s a fair warning that as you delve into this journey of self-discovery, you will reach a point (soon enough) where you realize there is no “U turn”; basically, when you see a truth about yourself, clearly enough, you can’t “un-know” it again, ever . . . it becomes a point of no return.  Of course, there is nothing more liberating than the truth, and you will discover that the more you simply go with your truth the more interesting/enjoyable, and aligned, your life becomes.  So this is not a “risk” rather it’s a path towards the freedom your being/heart desires so much.

Basically there are two ways to live:

     1.     You trade your inner freedom, or inner alignment, for a sense of pseudo-security.

     2.    You don’t compromise on staying true to yourself.

Both these choices are valid ways of living life.  I am not saying one is higher than the other, it’s just a choice you are making based on your present state of understanding/ awareness, and it’s where you are right now.

Of course, when you have a deeper awareness of your true nature as life-energy, you can’t help but make choice number 2 as your default choice, and a conscious movement towards choice 2 is a natural path of growth.

Also, when you make choice 2, long enough, choice 1 is no longer available to you because you lose the grip of your mind’s fear-based pull (which is required to live choice 1).  Choice 2 also takes you into the realm of fearless expression, but by “fearless” I don’t mean “reckless”, a better way of putting it would be that you live an expression aligned with your true nature which includes operating from a place of inner wisdom.  #1 You give in to your fears and cling to what feels like “familiar” grounds, rather than develop the trust in your life-stream’s intelligence and #2 to fully take care of your well-being/abundance as you live your truth.  You don’t realize that when you live your truth, you can’t help but feel abundant.

You're always free to change your mind and choose a different future, or a different past.”

What are your thoughts on this?  Life is about choice, and the different paths that each one brings with it.  Do some of the paths intersect at different points in your life, perhaps?  Does it bring with it another choice?

No road is long with good company.  Enjoy your friends and experience all of the twists and turns.  

Look forward to the journey . . . as Forrest would say, “You never know what you’re gonna get.”

Ice