“Wedding Cake”

and others from my wife’s friend Amy.



A Doctor was addressing a large audience in Tampa. "The material we put into our stomachs is enough to have killed most of us years ago.

Red meat is awful. Soft drinks corrode your stomach lining.

Chinese food is loaded with MSG.

High fat diets can be disastrous, and none of us realizes the long-term harm caused by the germs in our drinking water.

But, there is one thing that is the most dangerous of all and we all have, or will, eat it.

Can anyone here tell me what food it is that causes the most grief and suffering for years after eating it?"

After several seconds of quiet, a 75-year-old man in the front row raised his hand, and softly said; "Wedding Cake."

A Montana Highway Patrolman pulled a car over on I-90 near Bozeman.

When the Patrolman asked the driver why he was speeding, the driver answered that he was a Shrine Clown with a specialty as a magician and juggler, and he was on his way to Spokane to do a show that night at the Shrine Hospital and didn't want to be late.

The Patrolman told the driver he was fascinated by juggling, and if the driver would do a little juggling for him that he wouldn't give him a ticket.

The driver told the Patrolman that he had sent all of his equipment on ahead and didn't have anything to juggle.

The Patrolman told him that he had some flares in the trunk of his patrol car and asked if he could juggle them. The juggler stated that he could, so the Patrolman got three flares, lit them, and handed them to the juggler.

While the man was doing his juggling act, a car pulled in behind the patrol car. A drunk good old boy from Glendive, who had spent the day visiting various establishments on the way from Butte, got out and watched the performance briefly. He then went over to the patrol car, opened the rear door and got in.

The Patrolman observed him doing this and went over to the patrol car, opened the door and asked the rather "well oiled" fellow what he thought he was doing.

The drunk replied, "You might as well take me to jail, 'cause there's no way in hell I can pass that test."

Ice

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