Guest Comment by . . .

First, thanks Icewind for asking me to guest comment . . .

I know that most of you humans think we Moose are pretty stupid. But, we see a lot of things that happen when we're not eating. We've got time on our hooves, time to contemplate what's going on in our world. I've been living in this neck of the woods since my own mama ran me off up north from here. She'd gotten tired of me hangin' around eating the tasty browse and making eyes at the available bachelors. I can't blame her, because it's a tough world out here and there's a lot of competition.

You probably think moose aren't deep thinkers nor able to offer advice to you humans. After all, our brains aren't much bigger than an apple. And certainly our brains are much smaller than a head of lettuce. But we moose are surprisingly thoughtful.

Anyway, I want to talk to you about some changes I see around Alaska.

First off, this place is getting way too crowded! I used to be able to get a meal just about anywhere. Not any more! Winters here are long, dark, and cold with not much to choose from to eat except frozen twigs and branches. With all the traffic, I sometimes get a little pre-occupied with eating and forget to look both ways before I cross the road. I've lost many friends to collisions and just this winter . . . I lost my calf.

Alaska's gotten more people and now it looks like your kids are dying from making mistakes a parent should be teaching them to avoid. I invested many months into teaching my calf. I only had so long. There were many dangers out there in our world. I had to teach him what to eat, how to hide, and how to find me when he got lost. He was trying to cross a busy road ahead of me one night when he got hit by a car. I waited for him to come back, but he couldn't and didn’t. He was gone.

This last summer I witnessed a horrific crash that killed four young humans. They were going really fast in a car. After the crash I saw lots of people walking around the wreck shaking their heads and taking pictures, mostly of the mangled car and dead children. They say the driver was drunk. Now, I occasionally see people stop by and visit the memorial where it happened. There were lots of flowers, but I left them alone out of respect. It was summer and besides, there were lots to eat for me and my baby back then.

I've seen many other moose killed. Humans, especially the young ones, drive too fast and recklessly around here. I wonder if their mamas and daddy’s know that.

Every once in a while I get chased by people's dogs too. If I can, I try to run but, if I have to protect myself, I'll stomp or kick them real hard. Sometimes dogs hurt moose. Sometimes I kill dogs to protect my calf. I wonder if those dogs have families who love them? I wonder if they're missed like I miss my calf?

I hear that Alaska has a growing drug problem. I'm sure glad I've never tried drugs. Well, there was that one time when I got caught in the swing set over at the school playground. I got darted by the Fish and Game officer and I felt real weird when I woke-up. Sometimes I see young people acting real stupid and out of control, falling like I did. I wonder why they do that on purpose anyway. Do their parents know or care? I hear that one young person died from an overdose of drugs recently in Anchorage. I often wonder where do kids learn to do drugs. I hope it's not from their mamas or daddies.

I heard some gunshots once and found out that the police actually had a shoot-out with a drug dealer who vowed to kill any officer who tried to arrest him. That man had his kids with him in his car when the police tried to stop him. The police didn't know he had the kids with him. Rather than give-up, the scumbag decided to pull out a gun and start shooting. His child was hurt in the crossfire. Some people blame the police. I didn't. I thought humans cared for their kids. They used to. I thought humans would do anything to protect their children. I guess that I've been wrong. I thought that, besides September when moose killing season happens, most humans were pretty thoughtful. I guess that I was wrong about that too.

No Bull here . . . Goofy Moose

Have an Ice Day !

Ice