What about this idea . . . No Cars in Iraq!

In Alaska we have a great group of men and women serving our country while stationed at Ft. Richardson, home of our “Arctic Warriors” and the 172^nd Stryker Brigade.  Their tour was extended over in Iraq and like many other units the number of wounded or killed has grown over the last few years.

I saw yet another news story recently about insurgents using car bombs to attack security personnel in Iraq.  This includes the peace keepers and the Iraqi soldiers trying to support the new “Freedom Plan” government being established for this country.  This has become an almost daily occurrence and seems to have escalated in the last few months. 

Thinking about this for a little bit, I decided that the major issue as far as I can tell isn't with the feisty-ness of the insurgents or the poor security in Iraqi cities.  The biggest problem I can see is with the cars there.  They are just too convenient and plentiful to stuff with explosives, drive into a crowded area and be detonated doing major damage.  There is some damage to shops and buildings but it seems the most damage is to people, innocent or otherwise.  Too many good people are being hurt or killed by these cars or trucks.

So therefore, I would like to start a campaign to rid Iraq of all cars and we should probably lump trucks in there as well.  All of those Air Force planes flying countless sorties could use our ‘smart technology’ to rid the whole country of vehicles.  Same goes for our helicopter crews as this would be easy picken’s for those found away from crowded areas while the pilots would earn their pay for the more congested areas in the cities. 

Just a thought but I may have a few other ideas.

It could be called "Iraq – Back to a simpler Life” or maybe something like “Give Peace a Chance with a ‘Car Free’ Tomorrow".  Something with the kind of catchy sound to it or maybe a new ‘catch phrase’ for an Iraqi future that everyone would buy into for a safer place to live.  

Of course they will need an alternative mode of transportation.  I am thinking bicycles and if they still need that ‘familiar sound’ in their ears it would be easy for America to send over baseball cards to stick in the spokes of the tires like we did when we were kids.  It sounded great coming down the street, even the little old ladies could hear it and jump out of our way as we whisked by.  We could even throw in a bicycle horn for each one for that little bit of added excitement just like the good ole’ days. 

Or better yet horses or donkeys.  I don't think anyone can jam enough explosives up a horse's ass to do any major damage . . . unless there was that time in South Georgia when I was a small boy with my cousin.   If anyone has any other suggestions, I'd be happy to hear them and possibly include them in the plan.  We try to do our small part to keep our men and women safe and healthy.  I am sure by now the people of Iraq could use a better health plan than avoiding crowded places where vehicles gather or someone drives up on the sidewalk.

Let’s see, I'm going to need some seed money to get my research started on the feasibility of getting rid of all those vehicles . . . I figure that’s $ 100 or so a month would cover my expenses (bar tab) for my "think tank group" to get the ball rolling and a few things up and running.  Let me know if you are interested in contributing to this worthy cause.

Remember it's "Iraq – Back to a simpler Life” or “Give Peace a Chance with a ‘Car Free’ Tomorrow"  

That reminds me of something from long ago . . . * just walk in say "Shrink, you can get anything you want, at Alice's restaurant."  And walk out.  You know, if one person, just one person does it they may think he's really sick and they won't take him.  And if two people, two people do it, in harmony, they may think they're both ‘totally crazy’ and they won't take either of them. 

And if three people do it, three, can you imagine, three people walking in singin' a bar of Alice's Restaurant and walking out. They may think it's an organization.  And can you, can you imagine fifty people a day, I said fifty people a day walking in singin' a bar of Alice's Restaurant and walking out.  And friends they may thinks it's a movement.

And that's what it is, the Alice's Restaurant Anti-Massacre Movement of all the people on all sides in this ongoing conflict.

Show your support . . . send money . . . donate your bicycles and farm animals to a great cause. 

Have an Ice Day!