Icewind's Ramblings

An elderly couple was having dinner at another couple's house and after their meal; the wives left the table to go to the kitchen. The two elderly gents were talking, and one says: "Last night we went out to a fabulous new restaurant I'd highly recommend." The other man says: "What's the name of the restaurant?" The first man thinks long and hard with a furrowed brow, finally saying: "Ah, what is the name of that red flower you give to someone you love?" His friend replies: "A carnation?" "No, no. The other one," the man says. His friend suggests "The poppy?" "No, no, no" growls the man. "You know - the one that is red and has thorns." His friend says: "Do you mean a rose?" "Yes! Thank you!" the first man says. He then turns toward the kitchen and yells: "Rose, what's the name of that restaurant we went to last night?" ...

On the farm lived a chicken and a horse, both of whom loved to play together. One day the two were playing, when the horse fell into a bog and began to sink. Scared for his life, the horse whinnied for the chicken to go get the farmer for help! Off the chicken ran, back to the farm. Arriving at the farm, he searched and searched for the farmer, but to no avail, for he had gone to town with the only tractor. Running around, the chicken spied the farmer's new Harley. Finding the keys in the ignition, the chicken sped off with a length of rope hoping he still had time to save his friend's life. Back at the bog, the horse was surprised, but happy, to see the chicken arrive on the shiny Harley, and he managed to get a hold of the loop of rope the chicken tossed to him. After tying the other end to the rear bumper of the farmer's bike, the chicken then drove slowly forward and, with the aid of the powerful bike, rescued the horse! Happy and proud, the chicken rode the...

My friend SC sent me something that I wanted to share and it also got me thinking about a few things. Friends and friendship has been presented before as that is one of the things you go through your life and hopefully as you get older there are those you have around you everyday, those that are there for you without the everyday or recent contact but you know they are there for you or would be there if you needed them. This was a simple analogy and I do not know where it originally came from or who the author is. The words and concept have me thinking and looking at the different possibilities from my own life as different people have come and gone. I’ll comment more after so think about this concept and see where your own mind and life takes you. Life is a theatre – invite your audience carefully. Not everyone is healthy enough to have a front row in our lives. There are some people in your life that need to be loved from a distance. It'...

As 2006 winds up and another year has gone by the wayside I was thinking about what older movies I had watched this past year and what made my favorite list. I was watching some movies recently and thought about some older movies that I had seen this year or watched again and decided to put a small list of movies and/or scenes that made them enjoyable for me. What’s yours? My list goes like this: The Shawshank Redemption (1994) – Tim Robbins & Morgan Freeman – This movie was from a short story by Steven King, It's a poignant story about hope. It's also a story for freedom. Freedom from isolation, from rule, from bigotry and hate. Freeman and Robbins are majestic in their performances. Each learns from the other. It is one of my favorite all time movies. Last of the Dogmen (1995) – Tom Berenger & Barbara Hershey – I like the narration by Wilford Brimley all through the movie. The scenery is specta...

Real life has got in the way of me writing this week. News from home and a busy week at work have been partly responsible for my lack of writing. I have also started going back to The Alaska Club so I can get into better shape and lose some weight. I have wanted to do this for some time now but put it off for one reason or another. This is not a New Year’s Resolution as I had debated this for several months and I just happened to put into action now. Scott, one of the people I work with has also been trying to lose weight and me grabbing him for lunch everyday has not helped him in his quest for better health. We have decided to eat salads several days a week and possibly go to the club for a steam at lunch other days. We will do our 3 nights a week and hit the place on weekends. Now only to stick with that plan and see what happens. I was downtown the other day and went to the store. I was only in there for about 5 minutes getting some work out clothes. W...

It was a long busy day today at work and I wanted to relax a little tonight before I sat down to write this blog. I hooked up with several friends of mine in The Amazon Basin who play a computer game with me. We get together for a 10 night stretch of game playing every month. Several of us have been playing for several years now and others have joined us along the way. It is fun to get to know other people from around the world in such a simple way, playing “Diablo”. The game revolves around different characters going on quests and killing monsters and champions along the way. As you make your way through the game you will pick up gold coins, gather gear and weapons to use to help you in the many battles. The fun thing about this group is we are quite a varied lot in age, locale, and humor. Russ is a guy from Canada , John a Texan, Flick the Californian, Gimel is from Australia , Spatten is from Oregon , and the last two people are usually either new people...

I thought these “Old Fart” jokes were funny that were sent to me by a friend who thought they were right up my alley. Enjoy. Are we all starting to resemble these remarks? I hope not but sometimes I start to wonder. Ice

I had an interesting day today. I picked up my picture (1948 panoramic view of downtown Anchorage ) from the framer that I had received from my friend Tom for Christmas. After that I took my youngest daughter out for a driving lesson for about 2 hours. It was fun showing her the “secrets” of parallel parking, the effects of stopping distance on icy roads, as well as the driving around in all sorts of areas around town. She did great and drove well in the icy conditions. I figured I might as well teach her in winter conditions where she will be prepared for anything than wait until the summers sun returns in a few more months. This today along with listening to some old music had me remembering past times and old concerts that I went to many years ago. I’ll share one of the old great ones from Harry Chapin. Remember when the music came from wooden boxes strung with silver wire and as we sang the words, it would set our minds on fire, for we believed in thin...

Today was really busy as I put my wife on a plane to go south out of the cold and darkness to the warmth and sun of Hawaii for a convention. No time to really write anything today so here's a joke that was sent me by a friend here in Alaska . An older lady gets pulled over for speeding... Older Woman: Is there a problem, Officer? Officer: Ma'am, you were speeding. Older Woman: Oh, I see. Officer: Can I see your license please? Older Woman: I'd give it to you but I don't have one. Officer: Don't have one? Older Woman: Lost it, 4 years ago for drunk driving. Officer: I see...Can I see your vehicle registration papers please. Older Woman: I can't do that either. Officer: Why not? Older Woman: I stole this car. Officer: Stole it? Older Woman: Yes, and I killed and hacked up the owner. Officer: You what? Older Woman: His body parts are in plastic bags in the trunk if you want to see. The Officer looks at the ...

This is not really a “dirty” story, but an agricultural story! There was this farmer is South Georgia who had a couple of prized pigs. He had won several ribbons for his sows at the state fair for several years in a row. He wanted to pass on those fine qualities so he called his neighbor who had a fine boar to mate them with. His neighbor told him to load his pigs into his truck and bring them over to his farm and put them all in a pen together. The farmer told his wife he would be back a little later that he was taking his sows over to his neighbors. He arrived, unloaded his pigs and off they went into the pen with the wild boar name “Big Jake”. Later on the pigs all got together and there was a grunting going on that could be heard from about a mile away. After “Big Jake” had his way with the sows the two farmers loaded the pigs back into the truck to go back home and asked his friend, “How will I know if this took and my sows will be pre...

I am wondering when we will get back to the days of normal sunlight. We are into our Horizon Sun period of the year. The sun rises and never gets mo re than about 2 inches about the horizon staying in a flat arc across the sky. This is the road less traveled looking down my "street" (gravel road) over Thanksgiving. We had a good bit of snowfall in that time period but it has been unusually dry and hardly any snow since (less than 4"-6"). It has been a busy week at work so I think I will sit back and have a nice glass of my favorite, Guinness. Cheers everyone! And I guess for those that have cats around, don't forget to let them finish that last drop in the glass. Here Kitty Kitty, Here Kitty Kitty, Now I see why he never comes when called. Cheers! Don't forget your sun glasses when driving into the Horizon Sun! Ice

I am reminded tonight of a story I have heard many times over the years that usually was towards the end of a seminar and was told to make a point. I first heard this story as a small boy who enjoyed Aesop fables and the story was told a little differently then. There once was a little bird in the northland that enjoyed the warmth of summer. He chirped happily and eagerly ate as winter was approaching. The little bird prepared for his migration flight south. Pretty soon, the weather turned bad, got colder, and eventually started to snow. The little bird’s wings started to freeze up and nearly frozen glided into a large field. It continued to snow and now the bird was shivering trying to stay warm. A cow was standing close by and asked why he did not fly south for winter. The little bird said he thought it was so beautiful and nice where he was that he decided to stay and not make the long flight to stay in the warmer weather. The little bird had...

I received this one from a friend in Atlanta and tonight I did not have a lot of free time so I thought I would post this for your pleasure. Two things Navy SEALS are always taught: 1. Keep your priorities in order 2. Know when to act without hesitation A college professor, an avowed atheist and active in the ACLU, was teaching his class. He shocked several of his students when he flatly stated that once and for all he was going to prove there was no God. Addressing the ceiling he shouted: "GOD, if you are real, then I want you to knock me off this platform. I'll give you exactly 15 minutes!!!!! The lecture room fell silent. You could hear a pin drop. Ten minutes went by. “I’m waiting God, if you're real knock me off this platform!!!" Again after 4 minutes, the professor taunted God saying, "Here I am, God!!! I'm still waiting!!!" His count down got down to the last couple of minutes when a SEAL, just released from the Navy after serving in Afg...

Not really lost just slightly disoriented. Alaska is a really big place. Sometimes you forget just how big it is until you fly somewhere or take a drive on one of the few main roads. To give you some perspective, traveling in Alaska is like traveling no other place on earth. Alaska covers 570,373 square miles of land, plus an additional 45,000 square miles of water. It's the biggest state in the country. Alaska is 2.3 times the size of Texas , 10 times the size of Georgia or Florida ; and 499.7 times the size of frequent comparison victim Rhode Island . Alaska covers 20 percent of the total U.S. area. Alaska stretches across 57 degrees, 34 minutes of longitude between 52 and 54 degrees latitude. It’s BIG! The funny thing is there are only 4 major roads here, No interstate highways as we have no other state to connect with, only Canada . There are 5 other “main” roads but they mainly connect from the main “highway” into remote areas or villages and ...

along the way and thought I would throw them out and share with you on this coming of the New Year. Happy Holidays! I've learned... That life is like a roll of toilet paper. The closer it gets to the end, the faster it goes. I've learned... That we should be glad God doesn't give us everything we ask for. I've learned... That money doesn't buy class. I've learned.... That it's those small daily happenings that make life so spectacular. I've learned.... That the Lord didn't do it all in one day. What makes me think I can? I've learned.... That to ignore the facts does not change the facts. I've learned.... That when you plan to get even with someone, you are letting that person continue to hurt you. I've learned.... That love, not time, heals all wounds. I've learned.... That the easiest way for me to grow a...

Here's a nother childhood fantasy destroyed . . . Ain't no gold under that rainbow. And this reminder sent from a friend to those during this holiday season, Always remember . . . Happy Holidays! Ice

Once upon a time in the land of hushabye Around about the wondrous days of yore They came across a sort of Box Bound up with chains and locked with locks And labeled kindly do not touch, its War A decree was issued round about All with a flourish and a shout And a gaily colored mascot tripping lightly on before Don’t fiddle with this deadly Box or break the chains or pick the locks And please, don’t ever play about with War Well, the children understood Children happen to be good They were just as good around the time of yore They didn’t try to pick the locks, or break into that deadly Box They never tried to play about with War Mommies didn’t either Sisters, aunts, or grannies neither Cause they were quiet and sweet and pretty in those wondrous days of yore Well, very much the same as now, not the ones to blame somehow For opening up that deadly Box of War But someone did Someone battered in the lid And spilled the insides out across the floor A sort of bouncy, bumpy ball made up...